THE LIFE OF A DBM

Last summer I met a young lady 13 years younger than me. We kicked it for about 3 months. First let me give you a little background she was doing well for a 26 year old College degree, Job, apartment and new car. So at the end of the month she had very little money. I never had her pay for anything; I even gave her money to buy a dress for her friends wedding. Let me also state for the record that we did not have sex, we did a lot of other things. Now the reason we did not have sex was first I was sleeping with two other women and second my “spider sense” told me that something is not right and you may not want to go there. I have had two stalkers in my life time so I tend to listen to that voice from time to time.

To make a long story short we broke up, after one of my parties and she saw a lot of my female friends. Now the reason she stated for the not wanting to see me is that she wanted to be like me, buy a house, have more money, and find herself to figure things out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. (Don’t we all)

Cut to three weeks ago and I see her looking good but PREGNANT. I laughed my ass off. The fucked up part is she act likes she owes me money and runs away when I tried to say “HI”. On Saturday night I see her sister and she tell me that they still stay together in an apartment with no air condition and again she walks past me without speaking. Again I just laugh because I know that she is embarrassed knowing that she was already broke when I met her and with a child by herself (I asked her through an email the first time I saw her if she was getting married to the baby’s daddy and got no respond) she is going to be beneath broke.

I wish her the best.

This weekend I had a date with some I met online (another blog for another day) this was my second date with Ms.P. After the first date, I did not know if I was feeling her so I decided to give it another try. What a disaster, first we agreed on an 8:00 movie, I get there at 7:30 purchase the ticket and wait and wait and wait. At around 7:55 I get a call from her telling me she just left the house because her dad called with a personal matter (that is why they make cell phones so you can drive and talk at the same time). She finally makes it at about 8:45 (she got lost on the way to the theater). Strike #1

I exchange the tickets and we go to the concession stand and she complains about everything from how fattening Edy’s Dip are to the help and how kids are dumber know than they were when we were young. Strike #2

We are now watching the movie (Ocean’s Thirteen) and she TALKS through the WHOLE movie, with sound effects and questions. I wanted to be like Burt on the old television show “Soap” and disappear. Strike #3

Ms. P. broke all my rules:
1. Call if you are going to be late (especially when going to the movies)
2. Don’t complain about everything
3. BE QUIET during a movie.
Needless to say there will be no more dates with her.

P.S. The movie was alright.

My weekend
This weekend my boy came in town for Prince’s hometown Minneapolis, MN. This was his first time to the D and we had a great time. I showed him a lot of what we have to offer when it comes to women, from the hood rats to the MBA ladies. I’m telling you hanging out with my boy whom I had not seen in 3 years were like old time. It just shows me that jobs come and go but friends stay forever.

TMI Tuesday

1. What is the meanest thing you've ever done/said to a lover/loved one?
Leave her while she was gone on a weekend trip. (My ex-wife)
2. Have you ever had sex on an elevator?
Who do I look like Johnny Gill?
3. Have you ever lied about a rash and said it was a birthmark? OR Have you ever lied about a birthmark and said it was a rash?
No Janet Jackson going on here.
4. Have you ever had sex on a beach or in the water at a beach/pool?
No but I did it at a park once.
5. How old are you? How old do you feel? =P
39 but I feel 29
6. Have you or your partner been injured so badly during sex that you/they had to go to the hospital?
Never hospital injured but I have been sore the next day.
7. Have you been to a strip club or "titty bar"? (Hooters does NOT count.) If so, did you get a lap dance?
Back in the day I would go and get a lap dance but giving away money is not my thing anymore.
8. Have you ever had a "blog crush" (i.e., a crush on someone, of whatever gender, that you haven't met in person but only know through their blog)? Who? (Link, please, if you dare!) =P
Yes and her name is chubby chocolate @ http://chubbychocolate.blogspot.com

In a couple of weeks, I going to have a birthday. I'm very happy that I going to celebrate another year on this great earth. The issue is that I don't want to have a party or big whip to do. First let me state that all my friends this year have had get together or party for the same reason that they want me to do the same. They have turned the big 40. I don't want the world to know that I'm that old. Now before you call me a punk if you ask me my age I will tell, but I don't want to just freely give out that information. The funny part is that everyone is talking about me, saying that I'm over reacting. I don't care, I have nothing planned. I will probably just go to my favorite bar have a few drink and thank GOD for another year.

1. Should guys wear pink?
Yes if it is a shirt or polo short, I have a couple of pink shirts.

2. Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed?
Eyes open at first need to see what kind of responds I'm getting.

3. What is the first "non-physical" feature you tend to notice about a person you find attractive?
A matching voice. I know this is f**ked up, but if her voice does not match her features than its off.

4. Have you ever showered with someone of the opposite sex?
Of Course being a man I usually jump in the shower with a woman, (a shower cap is turnoff)

5. Would you rather receive amazing oral sex or have amazing sex?
Amazing sex involves amazing oral.

I have been in prison for three year. (not a real prison) but a prison in my mind. I had a boss for over 4 years who took away my spirit. This evil person beat me down like no other person I have ever let in my life. This person made me sick physically. I had to take many medical test, only to find out, that nothing was wrong with me. I finally quit that job three years ago and it has taken me that long to get that person out of my life and quit second guessing myself. I have decided to blog again to make the world aware that life is too short to let one person take your joy away. Quit being afraid and start living.

Could someone tell me what do Sista's want please tell me because that is the Million dollar questions. I have known this fine sista we shall call "PR". Now I love PR and everyone who knows me can attest to the fact, I want to sleep with her as bad as a crack head need crack. Before you say why don't you ask her out. I did this one night and got the line "Twin we are friends, blah blah blah",I did not hear much after that. Also all the time I have known PR she is out with her girls complaining how she can't find a man.
Well last night I see PR looking as fine as ever out with her girl. She goes and tell me that she went to St. Martin alone, telling me that she is her own best company. My minds start spinning like crazy.
1. Why waste the fun and sun of the island alone, are you looking for him?





2. You have no side dick you can call?
3. You could not call ME?
I would have gone broke for 4 days of fun,sun and PR.

Now PR is not the only sista I see around town who is all ways complaining how they are no good brothers. My question is what is wrong with YOU? Have sista set the bar so high that no brother but GOD is good enough.

It has been a long time since I have blogged. I need to keep everyone up to date on what I have been doing. Around a year ago I saw my first love for the first time in 26 years. Well let me give you a little background before I get into the story. I have blogged about this before so I going to give the Cliff Notes version. Went together in middle school (ups and down as it goes from 6 & 7th grade). She moves away, I wonder what happens to her through out the years. My best friends finds her takes another three years to actually see her because her much older husband thinks I going to take her away. Well unfortunately he dies and we agree to me. I plan my trip around the week of July forth week. I go to the ATL and then head to SC to see her. I drive 5 or 6 hours and of course I have all these vision of what she will look like. Now I'm not going to lie I also have fantasy of maybe we will hit it off and one things leads to another. Let me cut to the chase. I get to her house and she meets me and when I say "DAMN" I mean it. She looked about 80 years old. I don't know what kind of life she lived but let just say that her Jasmine Guy, and Lisa Bonet all have the same old genes. All my hopes and Dreams went right out the window. I kow this is selffish but I was readyto go home right away but I could not be rude. We went out to dinner and caught up on old time. With my fantasy gone I ended up leaving that night getting a hotel room and coming home in the morning. I know that GOD has a sense of humor because he laughed along with myself on how could I have thought this meeting was going to be like the movies. Ha Ha Hell.

Present Day: We still keep in touch and she is cool and I hope she never reads this but the lesson is that "you can look back but you can't go back"

It has been a long time since I posted. I need to post because it makes me feel better. A lot has been going on since my last post and I will catch everyone up. My first decision is not to let everyone know I back on line just post and see who see.

I have not posted in a month: I have been keeping some notes.

Blog for January 29, 2005

Today I went to see the movie Something New with Sanaa Lathan and Blair Underwood. The story in a nutshell is how a sista says she can’t find a good brother and ends up going out with a white man. Now mind you a sister had to help write this story because it was accurate in portraying how black women have a check list of 1,000,000 things before they will go out with a black man. Nice hair, smooth skin, nice car, right school, etc. It expresses how black women have all these hang ups and are uptight and that a brother ain’t got a chance in hell to make them happy. Now here comes the Knight in shining armor. He does not have to have 999,999 things thing that is on the sister list and he gets a date and the drawers. Now mind you I went with a sister to see this movie and she got upset when I pointed out that the women of color in the film are just like her and her friends UPTIGHT. They are all over 30 some 40 and still looking for Mr. Perfect. Mind you they are all crying about how they are sick and tired of sitting at home alone, and US brothers kicking it with white girls. The discussion continued with her agreeing that yes they are uptight but they are nothing wrong with having standards. I continued to point out that every one has standard but they also have to be realistic. I also shared with her that I have seen more women settle for less than, all the while turning down the “Good” Brother just because he may not be a 9 or 10 in the looks department. The movie was good in the fact that it created a dialog for us to talk again about the state of Black love.
My review of the movie is only 2 out of 4.

My Blog for February 22, 2006,
I have had a lot going on in the last month and have not had a lot of time to put me out on the web. I will try to make things short and sweet because I hate long blogs. First and foremost I had to go California for a big meeting. Meetings are as meeting go but the most tripped out thing that happen is that a punk N***A from ATL, tried to hit on me. I mean a brother on the DL. Now anyone who knows me knows I don’t play that. Not only was I offend that he actually stepped to me like that but he had the nerve to ask a female friend of mine if she could hook him up with some of her female friends. It was a blessing for him that we were at a work function or I would have beaten the shit out of his punk ass. This is the reason that AIDS is killing in our community.

Blog part II
I missed all of Super bowl week here in Detroit. I was in California and the Weather was lovely. I missed the parties and everything that went along with it. The plus side is that the weather was 70 degrees plus and I got to hang out by the pool and relax, In between the meeting and the drinks after the meeting.

Blog part III
I meet a secondary virgin. First and foremost this woman is fine as hell but she told me that she is now a secondary virgin. What the hell is that? After she done gave it away to more than one person for free or dinner and a movie. The next brother has to buy the whole cow, without getting a glass of milk. Ain’t that a bleep? I’ am serious thinking about pushing the limit and seeing how fast it will take me to it but I’m too old to waste my MONEY and energy on a hope and a prayer. They are too many women who will give it away for something less than marriage.

I want to thank all of you for being so patient during this month of crazy ups and downs.

Sorry I have been gone for a minute. I have not posted in a while. I have no excuses except I have been enjoying life and and new toy. A Treo650 (I heard the 700 sucks). So I can check my email from my phone and have not been in front of my desk top in a while. I also have been going out a lot. Making up for lost time (having a job will do that to you). I also have been getting phone numbers and getting back in the dating scene. The thing is that I have been meeting these 20 something females. I Talked to one and she said something about 35 BEING OLD, mind you I'm 38. Of Course I have not told her how old Twin is or the fact I was married while she was thinking about SAT, ACT or running for class president. I also have been getting beef from some of my friends, because they keep stressing to me that I will never settle down if I keep going out with children.(They all have been over the age of 22).
Now that I back dating again, I realize that I hate spending the money. Another thing that bothers me is the representative. You know the representative, who makes you seem perfect until the real person shows up. This usually happen after you sleep with them or after around 3 months. ( I rarely reach the 3 month mile marker) .
I know this is not my best post but I have to keep in touch with my blog friends and let you all know that 2006 is starting out better than 2005.