THE LIFE OF A DBM

My stalker(s) stories
I have had two stalkers in my life. Both were crazy as a coocoo clock. I will make these stories as short as possible because they could go on forever.
Stalker #1
The first one I will call "Gen". Twin met Gen at one of the parks I can't remember. She seemed cool and we went out and had a great time. Now being the dog that man tend to be, I just wanted the panties. So one night we are at her friends house, kissing, taking off clothes, etc and she goes when 'when I give myself to you, you will have my heart". This should have been a sign but I did not know at the time this would lead to one night of pleasure for months of pain. She began to call and ride by my parents house ( I still lived at home), saying that I used her. Well after a while she must have found someone else to bug because things just stopped. Until a few years later I was at church with my now ex-wife. I walk in and guess who I see "Gen". I was shaking in my boots. She did not say or doing anything. I was hopeful this would be my last encounter with a psycho but no.
Stalker #2 aka "Nutbag"
"Nutbag" yes this is what I call her and so do all my friends who meet her. I learned the hard way that when someone's says they are not crazy, they are crazy!!!! My divorced was just final and I was feeling down and horny. I ran across an old schoolmate who I had heard was a freak. This freak was 'Nutbag'. I won't bore you with the detail but after a few months I let her move in with me. This is when things really go bad. She would stay up all night, sometimes I would get up out of bed and she would be gone. Telling me she just left to take a drive, at 3:00 am. She would threaten to kill herself, ( I still have a knife missing from my culinary set). Things got really bad when someone called the police because the argument was so loud as I was trying to get her to leave my apartment. The policeman was laughing as I was telling him the story and he says to me "I have been in your situation before". After they put her out, she calls and says that she has no place to go and that she is very sick and the doctors said she might not live long. Long story short another lie. One of her friends called me explaining everything about 'Nutbag' is one big lie. How I was not the first person she lied to about being sick just to get free room and board. After I got rid of her she stalked me for another 11 months. Calling me no less that 30 times a day for the first 8 of these months. "Nutbag" cost me many sleepless nights, and I will post more 'Nutbag' stories in the future. I will end with this. She is still alive and kicking, pulling the same stuff, I heard through the grapevine that she got some money using the same 'sick' line.
After two crazies I know the signs. Fool me once shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me. Twin

Another hero has left us. Someone who did the right thing so that we all could go through life a little easier. Thank you for what you did and I know that God has blessed you in heaven.

I know I have not blogged a lot lately it has to do with me getting out the house more and less time in front of the computer. I borrowed this A-B-C of Me from Butta.

A - Age: 38
B - Best Friends: Thomas, The Sus, David and of course My other Twin. (Darius you are family)
C - Choice of Meat: Crab or lobster (is this a meat?)
D - Dream Date: A play or Jazz club
E - Exciting Adventure: Going to Las Vegas every year with my other Twin
F - Favorite Food: My mothers cooking
G - Greatest Accomplishment: Graduating College
H - Happiest Day of Your Life: Going to the State Fair with my dad when I was about 12. Hanging out with him and seeing him laugh and having a great time.
I - Interests: comics books, women and dating (I love women and dating), life
J - Joke: That I'm still unemployed and able to pay my mortgage
K - Kool-Aid: Grape
L - Love: Mia (still after all these years)
M - Most valued possession: My thousands of comic books.
N - Name: Keith
O - Outfit You Love: Jeans with a cream sweater along with Kenneth Cole shoes
P - Pizza Toppings: Sausage, pepperoni, onions, mushrooms, green peppers & anchovies.
Q - Question Asked To You the Most: "Are you the smart or dumb Twin."
R - Radio Station: Satellite-XM Radio (come on, they have a Neo Soul station, along with the show Love and money).
S - Sport: Golf and Football
T - Television Show: Grey's Anatomy
U - Umbrella in the rain?: Never, always hated them even as a kid
V - Video: I dislike them all, no substance, degrading to black women and our culture. ( I sound like and old man I need to lighten up.)
W - Winter: Best time to cuddle
X - X-rays recently?: Cat scan for my head.
Y - Year Born: 1967
Z - Zodiac Sign: I'm Twin and I'm a Cancer (Float, Float on)

Update
It has been a while since I posted. Last week was a downer I have not heard about the job in Chicago or another interview I had week before last. I will not bring every one down or myself I just will "keep hope alive".

My Weekend
On Friday I went out with "The Suz" and her friend. Now "The Suz" sets up her friend on date with a brother who lives in another state. Her friend did not want to be alone with him so she asked us to come along with her cousin (Marie you know you are tooo fine and sexy). I sure he did not think it was going to be a family and friend affair on the first night. Well as we are eating we get into a topic about sex. It start with someone saying that if a woman just lays there during sex it is the man faults. Of course I objected. My point is that some women just don't know how to F**k. I slept with a woman who looked liked like a dead fish ( she just laid there) when we did it. After going through this twice I bounced. I later found out that another person tried to sleep with her and he went through the same thing. This topic went off into another topic about how all pu**y is the same. I only had to say one thing is all D**k the same !? I had to explain to these lady that the hairy dugout falls into 4 major categories.
BIG- yes big as in deep. There are some that are so deep that a man will have to tie a board to his ass to keep from falling in.
Small - can also mean tight. Some women can't take dick.
Juicy - Wet and wetter. Some so juicy that you have to wipe it off or your dick off to get feeling.
Dry - like a desert. This chick better suck dick and you better eat out to get it a little wet.
This is the Cliff note version on how different coochie can be. I did have everyone at the table laughing on my theory.
After that me and "the suz" went to Bookie to have more drinks. Again another talk. Why do white bars give you more alcohol for your money and don't charge a cover. We had two tall beverages for $7 a piece. At the black bar it would have been at least $10 along with a $10 cover.
On Saturday I was over my friends house just talking about the good old days and saying how we would not want to be in high school right now for all the tea in china. I also was in great pain because my school lost again (MSU). They are going to make me grow old before my time.

Life in the D
I don't know what many of you know about Detroit. Detroit is like a big city that is on two small blocks. One block is on the east side and one is on the west side. Now is you live on the east side you don't go on the west side and vise versa. With it being such a small block, must people are only one degree of seperation from each other. It is not uncommon for you to have a relationship with someone and hear 'my boy used to kick it with her'. This happen to me not to long ago. I was kicking it with someone and my boy said 'you know one of our classmates used to kick it with her'. Now the freak meters comes on. Because now you can find out what she does before you hit the skins. You can also find out if this person is crazy or not.

I hate it when I can't sleep
It is 2:20 and I can't sleep. I sitting here reading and posting blogs while I do laundry. It appears that the older I get, the less I can sleep. So I thought I would write about how I lost my virginity at 12. My god sister had a birthday party. She was a couple of years older than me. Well after the party she has a sleep over. Old school style sleeping bags and watching T.V. (this was before VCR) well I remember we all were watching t.v. and then the girls wanted to play a game with the boys. Spin the bottle or something like that. Well after we all get to kissing and her mother stopped coming down stairs to see what we were doings since it was too quiet. We all just decide to go to sleep, or so I thought. As soon as the lights go off, one of her friends gets in my sleeping bag. This is the same girl who I kissed more than once. Well the next thing I know my underwear is off and she is telling me to get on top and pump. I did what she told me to do, now remember I had no idea what we were doing. She just guided it in and I did as was told. I'm not going to type here and tell you that it was like the fourth of july. After we were done I knew that I had done something cool but I just did not know what it was. Unlike kids today, Sex was not everywhere. I do remember thinking that if this is what sex is all about then I won't be doing this again for a long time. That thought did not last long because my first week in high school I got some more and it was the bomb and I have not stopped since. That is my story and I hope I have not bored you to death.

My Mentor
I had a job interview yesterday and was asked who was the person who I admire the most. Every time I'm asked this question I answer this question with the same answer "My father". This is the man who taught me the meaning of being a "Man". I want to give a shot out to my father. This is the man who do so many things for his family, I only hope to do the same one day. He took care of business. Every summer we went on a trip. We rode in a car (not on an airplane) and bonded. He exposed me and the other twin to things that made my friends in the neighborhood jealous. He was hard on us. I understand why he would not let us do certain things because every one else was doing it. My dad did not start school until he was 7 or 8 and did not finish until he was 19 or 20. I learned this winter that he had to walk to school and that he quit a few times because he was tired of walking. He did not go when it rained and at certain times of the year because he had to work in the fields. Education was very important to him and he made sure he saved so that me and my brother could go to school. He taught me the meaning of hard work and how to be a father and husband. To always take care of business. He told me to make sure you have you own stuff. That way you don't have to ask any one for nothing. This is also a person who would help anyone. When I say anyone I mean anyone. I have know him to help strangers along with friends. As a kid I always had to "hold the light" when he was fixing things. I did not know how much I had learned when it comes to fixing things. This comes in handy when women call me and ask me to put something up or I just came back from Home Depot can you help me. This has been a rough year financially and I was not going to ask for help but he told me that being a man also means asking for help. Thanks dad!


HR Woman
I had an interview yesterday in Chicago. They flew me there for an 4 hour interview. I would have to move there which is no problem. That was not the issue. I had to interview with 4 individuals and the first person I interviewed with was from HR. It was a sister and I can only say one thing she was fine. At times when she was talking to me it was hard to concentrate and I know I blew some of the answers that she asked me. I could not help it I keep looking into her eyes and thinking "damn she is gorgeous" This has never happen to me before. Usually I interview with men or unattractive females. Never have I interviewed with a woman who I wanted to ask out. This sucks because not only do I want the job because it will be a great opportunity but I also want the job so that I can go out with her. I know don't play where you eat, been there and done that before. (another post) But she was fine.

The Affair
As many of you know that I never cheated on my ex when I was married. When I got divorced I told myself that I would never sleep with a married woman because their are too many single women. Well what is the saying never say never. I met "Ren" at the casino. When I met Ren I thought she was single because when she I gave her my cell number, she said that she needed a home number. Ren and I got to talking, met her family and we hit it off. I took her to my company Christmas party. Everything was going great, until one Sunday morning. After a night of making love to Maxwell. I was on the phone to my bother talking about someone we went to high school with back in the day. After that conversation, Ren asked me if I knew a certain individual. When I told her yes, Her next sentence was "That is my husband". Husband! When did you get a husband. I knew she had a son, but not a husband. Ren went on to explain that they are separated and trying to work things out. Now any sane person would have let things end right then and there. But not Twin I went back. Now all the other time we had relations we were at my house. However one night after I dropped her off at home. She asked me if I wanted a night cap. Well one thing led to another and we are in the bed gigging. Now for us grown folks, you know how there is a halftime from one half to another. It was during this halftime that the phone rang. All I heard on the other end was "who's car is in the driveway". I proceeded to jump up and find my clothes while I asking her I that you were separated. She said I told you we were trying to work things out. As I running out the house putting my clothes on, I realize I still have to get out of the drive way. Lets just say I hit a curb or two getting out. Me and Ren official broke up after that day. The funny part is that I really liked Ren and I ran into her about a year later. The last thing she said to me after a brief talk was that she wished she would have stayed with me. I think about Ren from time to time and wonder how things are going. As for sleeping with another married woman. I will never say never.

Little Brother has gotten Big!
First Friday I went to an event we have here called Day of Music. It is an event where different bands play for 24 straight hours. I was there with a few friends and it was cool to see all different types of people dancing, drinking and having a good time. We then went to a club that was off the hook. I did not mack anyone since I'm low on funds. My feeling is that since I can't treat a woman right, there is no need to invest in someone time and I need to focus my efforts on other things.
Saturday was a whole different event. I was at the Urban tailgate party with a bunch of friends to see MSU lose again to UofM. It was cool seeing Zed and all the other people. I'm really mad my school lost because I really hate Michigan fans. Unlike Spartans fans who most went to MSU. Michigan fans tend to be people who only advance education is at Belle Isle University. The party was also a trip because I ran into a friend who still makes my heart skip. This person whom I will call "V" was my boy older sister friend growing up. "V" was and is fine as hell to me. When I was younger I used to dream about hitting it and her being 5 years older than Twin made no difference to me. Well I had not seen "V" in a long time, at least 10 years. I see "V" on Saturday and after it took her a minute to recognize me, she said to me I use to think of you as "my little brother". WTF! Girl I have not been little in a long time plus I was trying to get my mack on because the fantasy of a young man where going to come true. Well to make long story short I found out that she is seeing someone but I did get the number. I may try to get with it on a later date. I'm still cool with my boy sister.

Why do sister front?
I'm asking this questions because of something I notice when I go out. The origin of this question occurred to me again on Friday. When I was out at the club, I saw a person who number I got when I first was divorced. The two times I tried to have a conversation she always had an excused on why she could not talk. The best one was that she was going to New York to record an CD. That was 7 years ago and she is still in the club hanging out. I mean I see more sister whom I have heard about how they are tired of being alone. But if you go to an event they are there acting like that have a man but I know the are fronting and trying to find one. Sister quit fronting like you don't need or want a man. You know you do because we all want someone. Saturday was no exception, I saw a person who has an ad in Yahoo personal. I bet she left with out giving someone her number.